#RealTalk Stephan A Smith keeps it real!

Dirty Laundry

Let’s do this dirty laundry 

Someone sent me an email asking me to post this question.

Tracy I have a question for you.  How long should I wait on my man to commit to being in a monogamist relationship?   We have been dating for two years now and he still hasn’t made a commitment to me.  I know he loves me because he has been with me for 2 years but he still doesn’t want me spending the night at his house but he spends the night at my house whenever he wants to.  I cook for him at least 3 days a week and we don’t even live together.  I go over his house and make him dinner  3 times a week, tidy up the house and give him a little but he still says he is not ready to be in  serious relationship??  I just don’t understand why men today don’t know when they have a good women!  Are there any good men left in this world??

Mia

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First let me say that Mia I don’t think he is the one with the problem.  I think you may be the one who has the issues not him.  You see he is upfront with his shit.  He told you that he is not committing to you but yet you still give him everything anyway so why wouldn’t he keep you around.  He continues to get the best of both worlds with you.  Your initial question is an oxymoron “How long should I wait on my man to commit to being in a monogamist relationship?”.  If he was your man he would already be committed so stop claiming him when he is not claiming you!  Ask your self a question Mia.  Why are you acting like his woman when he makes it clear to you that he is not your man?  Why are you cooking, cleaning and sexing a man who doesn’t want to be in a monogamist relationship with you?  The solution to your problem is easy Mia.  The only thing that needs fixing is you.  If he is not ready to commit no matter what you do he still won’t be committing to you.  Stop giving him the amenities of having a wife when he is not willing or ready to commit himself willing to you. You can’t force, coerce or trap a man into a committed relationship.  The only way he will commit to a relationship is if he truly wants to and I don’t know about you that’s the only kind of man that I want!  Now that’s jut my opinion some people may feel completely different.

Tra