Memoirs of a single woman


Put your heart first.

If you’re looking for love then you must put your heart first.  You have to fall in love with your heart not just his style or his sex.  Just because a man can slay you in the bedroom doesn’t automatically mean he is the one! If you are looking for a relationship the last thing you should do is sleep with a man first.  I know this is true from personal experience and I have seen it happen to a number of women.  The problem is we go into things these days with a different focus.  We tend to focus on sex more than a man’s heart and because most women are emotional that’s a recipe for disaster.  What we need to do when we are looking for a husband should be taking it a little slower and focus more on how they make your heart feel instead of how they make your Vajj feel.    Just think back on your past relationships and tell me how many times you have dealt with a man for way too long just because he could put it down in the bedroom?  While you think about it, let me tell you that I can guarantee more than half of the women  and maybe men reading this has done it before which has wasted a lot of precious time and caused lots of pain.

Sex is important so believe me I know this is a hard thing to do. Contrary to popular belief some of us good women have an extremely high sex drive so it’s not easy to abstain however it is the best thing to do.  Today I was talking with my oldest daughter and she said that often women try so hard to audition for the role of a wife.  In my opinion it was a profound statement.  My daughter at age 19 is an extremely intelligent young lady (we did a great job).  She is right because women/young ladies feel like having sex with a man is the way to become his girlfriend but you sex should be what you do when he has plans on making you his wife.   I’m not saying wait until marriage before having sex what i am saying is wait until your at least his girlfriend before taking it to that level.    Some women will play the wife/wifey role to the bitter end in hopes of landing the gig as his wife/wifey.  You give a man 110% before he even acknowledges you as a girlfriend (by the way just because you have sex a lot doesn’t make him your man and you his future wife it just means you’re having a lot of sex).   We as women will choose to audition against a number of other women just to get the title role and the crazy thing is some of us are ok with being the #1 instead of being the ONLY ONE.

If you are looking for love then you have to put your heart first.  Stop trading sex for love and attention.   You can’t sex man so good and make him fall in love with you.  It will not work!!  Now you can make him lust after you but there is a difference between love and lust.   Lust is not going to get him to introduce to his family.  Lust is not going to make you his wife.  Lust is not going to give you a key to the house.  Lust will not make him stay faithful to you.  Lust will not stop him from finding someone else to lust after. As you can see all the things that lust cannot do is the exact opposite of what a women looking for a husband should be focused on.  If you want that man to make you his wife then he needs to first make you fall in love with his heart before trying to make you fall in love with his d***.    Now this goes both ways because you need to make that man fall in love with your heart instead of trying to p**** whip him.    For some women I know your skills in the bedroom are top notch which makes a  little hard not to get them whipped (lol) which is even more of a reason why you should hold off on having sex before  falling in love with a man.  Now don’t get me wrong if you are not looking for a relationship right now then by all means “Samantha Jones” it up because she is one my  idols but if  your plans are to find a good husband and  you’re ready to be a good wife then remember to put your heart first.  You have to go into a relationship with the right intentions in order for it to work out.  If your intentions are to fall in love then make sure the man you are dealing with is husband material before you decided to act like his wife.